Simply saying the words that were never spoken or feeling emotions that were never felt

Simply saying the words that were never spoken or feeling emotions that were never felt, without shutting down, acting out, or self medicating, can be deeply healing for us who carry frozen or denied pain. This fairly straightforward process can allow us to make sense of ourselves and what drives and defines them in our life and relationships. Sharing emotions that come up can result in healing and relief for us who longs or needs to get in touch with our child within and feelings we may be carrying unconsciously. As these feelings come forward, the thinking that was frozen in place starts to come forward, too. The body moves and the mind and heart follow. Identifying that “I want to run, to fight and defend myself, to collapse . . . I want to talk, to hug or to be held” can help us to come out from the shadowy depths of our unconscious child, into the sunlight. This can be a confusing process. After sharing with moving clarity about something that we have long held in silence, for example, stagers often say things like, “Did that make any sense?” or “I feel like I’m babbling.” Quite the contrary, those listening are often riveted, sitting on the edge of our seats as they quiver with identification and emotion. This kind of “aha” moment is healing not only for the one sharing, but for all those watching, who suddenly see that they, too, may have such eloquence and intelligence in their pain. 

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